A school teacher educates our youth on the critical issues of the day:
“Hey Kids. You all know what it’s like to have a Fire Drill or an Earthquake
Drill and I know you’ve grown to love those little drills, especially when the
bell goes off in the middle of a math test.
Well, this year, boys and girls, we’re going to try something special. A new kind of drill: It’s called the Jihad
drill. Do you know what a Jihad is? It’s a Holy War. I’ll bet you didn’t know a
war could be holy. Holy Wars used to be fought with swords but that was in the
olden days. Today they use bombs instead.
Therefore, when the bell rings for a Jihad Drill, it means somebody has set
off a bomb at your school or at least delivered a bomb threat.
Yes, Jihad drills are important but that doesn’t mean we’re against Jihads.
After all, Jihad is a practice of the religion of Islam and we must never
object to a religious practice unless the practice includes a cross or a
Christmas tree. Crosses and trees suppress people’s rights but the spread of
Jihad is merely the spreading of peace because Islam is the religion of peace. How
do we know it’s a religion of peace? Because
Muslims tell us it’s a religion of peace, silly. Oh sure, once in a while they
kill in the name of their religion but Christianity did the same a thousand years
ago. Besides, we wouldn’t have Jihads at
all if your Mommies and Daddies weren’t driving those gas guzzling SUV’s. The nice Muslims are merely trying to teach
the oil sucking Americans a lesson.
So if one of your little playmates gets blown up with a bomb, don’t blame
religion, because that’s not nice and don’t blame people because that’s not
nice. Just blame your SUV’s. SUV’s
aren’t alive and you can’t hurt their feelings and they aren’t as important as
people. But SUV’s run on oil and too much oil drilling is bad for the
environment. It kills trees. And trees are as important as people.
It’s wrong to drill for oil in America.
But it’s OK to drill for oil in Muslim countries. See the difference? But it’s
wrong to buy too much oil from Muslim countries because all that money makes
the nice Muslims want to go on a Jihad. And
that’s why we have Jihad Drills.
So let’s review: We have Fire Drills, Earthquake Drills and Jihad Drills.
The next time somebody insults Muslims and tells you they haven’t added any
traditions to our culture, you just remind them about the Jihad Drill. That’s
all for this week, kids.”
-As heard on The Bob Siegel Show
by Smiley Miley
Note: The Bob
Siegel Show can be heard every Sunday from 3:00 to 4:00 PM on KCBQ 1170 on the dial
or KCBQ.com to listen live over the internet.
Call in
toll free number if you want to join in the program with questions or comments:
1-888-344-1170
Bob’s
website is: www.bobsiegel.net
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