During Bush’s first term,
when people were blaming him for everything imaginable, many of us joked that
sooner or later they would blame Bush for the weather too. Then Hurricane
Katrina hit Louisiana and the joke became reality. Bush was blamed because
of his lack of interest in Global Warming. He was also blamed for his failure
to respond soon enough. In fact, Bush “responded” even before Katrina hit,
offering to federalize the Louisiana National Guard. Governor Kathleen Blanco turned him down.
Oh well. It doesn’t matter. Clearly this hurricane was
the fault of that horrible George W. Bush. But it was a long time ago and the
blame no longer sounds so far fetched. Therefore, to keep the subject
interesting and relevant, here are some other things you can blame on George W.
Bush.
Top Ten New Things You Can
Blame On The President.
10) Returned letter because
you forgot to put on a stamp.
Explanation: You were
forgetful because you were understandably distracted, thinking about the
horrible policies of George Bush.
9) Your kid fails his
reading test and is unable to pronounce the words.
Explanation: The kid was
just mimicking the President when he stuttered over words in his speeches.
8) Your local grocery store
was robbed.
Explanation: The crook was
probably unemployed and needed to feed his family. He would have been employed
if not for George Bush.
7) Flat tire
Explanation: Rubber comes
from trees.Trees are as alive as human beings. A tree was cut down by
imperialist lumberjacks. The rubber in the tire couldn’t perform its function
properly because it was never meant to exist in a tire in the first place and
only exits there due to evil, rich companies who do the bidding of… George
Bush
6) Your girlfriend broke up
with you.
Explanation: It’s because
you watch too many of those violent action movies and these movies remind her
of George Bush.
5) Computer virus:
Explanation: Al Gore
invented the Internet and not George Bush. Had he been made President, computer
viruses would have been done away with by now.
4) Your Slurpee at 7-ll ran
out of cola too soon, so that in no time at all, you have all ice.
Explanation: The quick
evaporation was due to Global Warming, which George Bush won’t do anything
about.
3) On cable television, TV
Land comes in better than Bravo.
Explanation: Bravo shows
those liberal Hollywood movies, where as TV Land shows unrealistic family programming like
Leave It To Beaver. This is no coincidence. Probably the Bush administration
and the FCC have a conspiracy to ban channels like Bravo.
2) Price of gasoline is too
high.
Explanation: It’s because
we are in Iraq where we can take their
oil. Of course we haven’t taken their
oil. Come to think of it, if we really did take their oil, the price of gas
would have gone down. But we might take it someday and that’s why it went up.
1) People are coming across
our boarders and our government won’t do anything about it.
Well, I hate to say this,
but that one you really can blame on George Bush.
Some of Bob’s other controversial posts: