Posted by
Bob Siegel on Friday, August 01, 2008 2:30:46 PM
Her name was Dannette. I will always remember her as a woman who
showed a rare courage in the face of a mighty adversity, a woman
willing to challenge the tide of the times and stand up for what she
really believed. Indeed, many others believe in the same thing, but
Dannette had the guts to speak up on behalf of the silent majority.
She dared to tread heavily where others would not even skate.
Dannette, you see, was at her wedding rehearsal, giving instructions to
a couple of ushers. "When you seat people tomorrow," she said,
"Mothers with infants and toddlers are to be seated in the back with
clear instructions to leave if their child makes noise. The last time
I went to a wedding, I couldn't hear a thing the minister said because
a baby was screaming the entire time."
I wanted to applaud! I wanted to dance! I wanted to do cartwheels!
Not because she was sharing some outrageously clever idea which no one
had ever thought of before. Quite the contrary. I believe many have
wanted to do the same, but instead have refrained from bursting another
of those sacred cows, which we Christians manufacture on a daily
basis. After all, weddings are about family. How can we be respecting
family if little Johnny and cuddly Doris aren't decked out in the
cutest of outfits, sitting next to Aunt Flawsy? If they interrupt the
wedding, so what? It's cute, and what's more, it's kin!
Never mind the hours of rehearsal, or the half-year of planning which
went into making this once-in-a-lifetime day a special experience no
one would ever forget. Never mind that the minister might want
somebody to actually hear what he has to say about marriage, or that
the couple may have written their own unique marriage vows. Never mind
that their best friends are going to sing. It doesn't matter! What
matters, is the jubilant noise of youth reminding us of how wonderful
it is to bring relatives together in one room.
We do little better at church services. In a wedding, nobody even
thinks to provide a nursery, but churches do offer such a convenience
for interested parents. Still, there is always the parent who isn't
interested, who doesn't want anyone else holding her baby. Yes, this
sacred cow visits most churches on a regular basis, for even when
childcare is offered, it is seldom insisted upon. Nobody wants to be a
bad guy. Nobody wants to say, "All right. If you don't wish to take
your child to the nursery, we are at least going to ask that you sit in
the back and leave the room immediately if there is the slightest peep."
Sounds terrible, doesn't it? Sounds cruel, unreligious, anti-parent
and a whole host of other nasty things. Not to mention that if you say
this to a first time visitor, they might not come back. Then the
numbers of the church would not go up and what could be more important
than that?
I realize it is not easy being a parent. (I raised two children of my
own.) I realize that babies and toddlers are going to make noise.
These are simple facts of life. Parents who have learned to ignore
screeches and squirmings, so as to get housework done, are to be
congratulated. It is a skill likened to three-dimensional chess. But
this very virtue can be a problem outside the home. In fact, if a
parent is able to ignore the voice of a child while listening to a
sermon, it may be all too easy for them to assume others are doing the
same. Sorry Mom, sorry Dad, this is not the case. Instead, people are
missing the sermon. An inability to view loud Junior as a problem, is
insensitivity at the very least, and downright rudeness at the very
most.
I am calling upon Christians to re-evaluate this sacred cow, because
there are genuine sacred practices, which this cow interrupts with its
non-stop mooing. Is it compromising our high view of family to insist upon childcare? Who benefits when children ruin church services? Do we want a child's first memories of church to be Mom saying, "Shh. Sit still," when that memory could be of loving people reading to them and playing games with them? Who are we really catering to by allowing this distracting, annoying practice to go on? We are catering to some cautious parents who do not like baby sitters. The trade-off isn't worth it! Let's do away with the cow. Elsa isn't as sacred as we think.
By the way, Dannette's ushers did instruct a woman to take her baby out
if it made noise. When it started crying, she stood up and moved to
the back door. She remained there, as her infant cried for the
remainder of the service. OK, so nobody heard the wedding ceremony,
despite the cautious, but virtually ignored instructions. Never mind.
It was family! And after all, isn't that what a wedding is really all
about?
Other blogs about Christianity from Bob Siegel:
Does
Jesus Belong on the College Campus?
Try
To Follow This Logic: If God Exists, God is Real
Does the Bible Really Speak About the Future?
What is the Unforgivable Sin and How Do I Know If I've
Committed It?
Does The Bible Teach An Age of Accountability?
Was Jesus Gay?
How Should We Pray For Healing?
Is The DaVinci Code Something to be Taken Seriously?
How Does One Become a Christian?
My Brief Time In the Occult
How Do We Know Which Manuscript Copies Truly Belong In The
Bible?
Does The Bible Teach That God Is Everything or that God Created
Everything?
Was Jesus A False Prophet?
Why Are There Different Versions of the Bible?
Three Questions That Test Your Friend's Opinions
Subsiding All The Passion Over "The Passion"
Cherry Picking Our Doctrines
St. Bob's Epistle To The Calvinists
Oh, That Horrible Christianity!
Was Judas Forgiven?
Oh Yeah? Well David Did Alot of Stupid Things
If You Don't Like Her, Take It Up With Jesus
Calling God Allah: What's In A Name?
How To Cause A Muslim Freudian Slip
Behavior Not Even A Christian Apologist Can Defend
Evidently Christians Don't Hold A Monopoly On Stupidity
I'm Not Doing It For the Warthog and the Pine Cone
Is Persecution Good For The Church?
A Pro-Choice Christmas Card?
The No Longer Sacred Santa
Can A Christian Be Pragmatic?
Now Kids, Keep The Name of the Holiday a Secret
Are Christian Ministers Just In It For The Money?
Christianity, Judaism and Islam: Comparison
Is Mormonism Really a Cult? Let's Finally Settle This Once and
For All
How a Reformed Jew Became an Evangelical Christian Part One
Are Christians Expected to Keep the Sabbath?
If The Gospel Was Fake, This Would Have Been A Really Dumb
Thing To Include
Did Jesus Really Claim To Be God?
Did Jesus Really Claim to be The Messiah?
The Prayer Game
Can The Existence of God Be Proven?
Can't I Accept Christ On My Deathbed?
The Day God Gave Me One Hundred Dollars (And Believe Me; I
didn't Deserve It)
Is Tithing Really Biblical?
The Day A Scholar Said Scholars Aren't Scholarly
Of course the Trinity is Impossible! Haven't You Ever Studied
Math?
Jesus Didn't Rise! Wait Until You Hear How They Decided
Did Jesus Fulfill Bible Prophecy? Isaiah 53
Was
Jesus The Promised Messiah? Daniel 9
Does
God Have a Sense of Humor?
He
Told Me My Prayer Was Not A Valid Prayer
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Scripture
taken from THE HOLY BIBLE
New
International Version NIV
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Used
by permission of Zondervan Publishing House.
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